[email protected]

What is beauty? I see beauty as something that makes me feel warm and fuzzy inside, like a sunset warms the soul. I see beauty in good people, nice people, a rare commodity in this age of the fast paced phone world. Since being a child and my first crush Trisha Pyron in the 5th grade, I have  been aware of what I thought was beautiful, I remember I was worried that maybe it would change over the years and I would no longer think the same, seems an odd thought, but that was my thinking in the 5th grade. In hindsight, looking back on my early years, although Trisha was my first crush, I had many others, well I grew up in Southern California, and you [...]

We just flush, where does it go? who cares its gone. we take for granted one of, if not the most significant modern conception, the sewage system, they turn that turd you just flushed into drinking water, well drinkable water anyway, not sure if anyone drinks it of all the advances, this for me is the best, at least in the cities, my dark mind often says, look at all these people in the cities, a whole lot of shit yeah I said it shit, my ma, used to say "SHIT"  almost half funny, but we are a clean  society, well at least not piles of the stuff everywhere, can you imagine all these people crapping all over the place? nfw Then there was the great toilet [...]

I know that i Have mentioned this before, but I have been thinking about it again, with the shit show that is our lives, but White is a racist word, it has become the equivalent of the N word. "he is white"  that is a fkn slur, or I am "white" that is as racist ass you can get. I hear it now and cringe. Society has been able to loop all of everyone into a bleached white category, and nobody seems to notice.  this word is used to either promote Nazism or demonize people of caucasian ancestry. this is as plain as the nose on my face. eye for one am sick of it. I am not proud to be white, but I am proud to [...]

not masturbation either, but love thyself I know kinda goofy, kinda silly, kinda self centered? I have come to embrace my self, I have come to embrace that I am  a Native American, specifically an Eskimo (yupik/Inuit, mom says yupik, dna says Inuit, but they both were near the same area, near Nome, Alaska) my Aleut, and Athabascan roots, too,  which are supiaq or some other new Politically corrected, how do they even know, how to translate to english? by sound, was there an alphabet? that better left to the scholars.  I am Native, and Proud to be Native, yes, and I am embracing being Native, not for entitlements, but for the sheer joy of being proud of my ancestral past, that also mean  I am proud [...]

here we go Superbowl time, I kinda want Brady to win another one, dont you, he seems ageles, so unless I get someone to bet me some dough, I am going to be rooting for old man Brady, who is 15 years younger dan me:/ you know, now that I think about it, at that age, I was actually older than I am now, that sound suspicious, but mindset is the most important issue, when thinking of age. Diet plays a huge role too, but mindset, is key. the truth be told, I just started watching football last week, well two weeks ago, so all I know about either team, was learned last week. I am taking my new thyroid meds, they seem to be making [...]

Yes, we, well at least me, needs to keep the optimistic approach to life and enjoy every moment every minute I  have on this earth. I will be the first to admit, my mind and thinking is damaged, no way around that without a brain transplant, maybe, get the brain of a chicken, like Johnny Cash did in "chicken in Black"  great song I know that I tend  to create scenario's without actually having proof, or perhaps about future events, now this is a double edge sword of sorts The approach to life, has served me well, since the days, of absolutely, thinking nothing through, except, I need money, dont black out, dont drive drunk, ect, ect. No thinking ahead and the possible potential serves me well, [...]

Wow 32 years, who would have thunk, that I could ever have a "normal relationship" let alone stay married to the same woman for 32 years, well that is not exactly true not is it Richard? well... you got me there, but I refuse, to use the subsequent date, maybe I am stubborn, or just stupid, maybe a little of both. I will not go into too much detail, but I will share some of the sordid details of my transformation from a drunken cad of a husband to a loving father and husband, and my own opinions on the subject. Marriage, is not an easy thing, just like anything worth having it takes work, at least in my case. We had made a pact to quit [...]

We are our pasts, for me, I embrace, the good the bad the ugly.  I will not shame away, but stand proudly against all invaders, good or bad. that sums up me past thoughts, thinking, stinking, thinking I am not the person I was before I quit drinking, nor  am a person that never drank. Nor, will I cast blame, it was me, for good or bad. it was me.  am I still the same person? yes, it was me. does my past define me, Yes it does, and I embrace it. Have i changed, YES o yeS, IT IS TRUE. i HAVE GROWN UP AND OUT OF MY PAST SKINS, but they are me, were me. still reside within me. without my mistakes, I may be [...]

Yes, for  sure, if you want it to repeat over and over, as it has many time, not only in history, but in life. We must embrace the past, our past and all before us, We are a War like creature, that is the past, there is little peace times, except, when stagnant, under the rule, of another, for instance as the Native American is now, yes it is history, Alaska was purchased lock stock and barrel from the Soviet Union. Alaskan Natives, served this country and died for this country, yet they are still second class citizens in the minds of the ruling elites. rights to land, they can not use. do you think your abuser is going to all of sudden change? American has been [...]

My biggest failure, is one that I WAS UNAWARE OF,  food is medicine, and poison.  The Internet is the greatest things to ever happen in my life, besides becoming a father, yet it came too late in the game, to save my own father or to be able to ensure that my offspring, would live healthy lives, not only healthy, but vibrant lives, the toxins we put into our bodies in the form of sustenance is sickening. The lives we are programmed to live, toxic.  I keep thinking of Walt Frizzell and Joe Warwick, they worked themselves to an early grave, I mean no diss on thier lives, They both produced loving families, and were very loved, both were working to death do us part with this [...]

I do they they need to get to the bottom of the Capital debacle, not sure if going after an EGO driven TRUMP, who espouse this Media attention, It does seem to be alot of vengful rhetoric, from Political Hacks, is this the right move, do bring Americans together, this nimskil, thinks not, but I's just one sheep of many who have had enough, maybe he should be, but I would insist on his pulpit, also being held accountable, Twitter and Facebook, whom have shown the ability to censor, whomever they please, for whatever they please. NOW after years of Nonsense, they censor, him after the crime of being able to manipulate, millions of sheep? in a Charles Manon like attack on the Capitol? maybe a witch [...]

[armelse]